Of unemployment.
And finally I'm almost getting a chance to relax.
Out of my 11 weeks of severance payment plus the 4 and a half weeks of vacation payout I am coming up on using a quarter of it.
Relaxing is weird though. I think Thursday (2 days from now) will be the first day I won't have anything planned.
No errands to run. Nothing to help out on.
Only breathing. Eating. Using the bathroom. Taking my dog out to use her grass bathroom.
The past 25 days have not felt like I've been unemployed. I spent 10 of them throwing "going away" parties, dinners and brunches, happy hours and then finally cleaning up after all the mess that was left and making sure we shipped everything we wanted to Charleston (we didn't).
I spent 7 of those 25 days skipping from hotel to hotel across the country.
And the past 8 days have been used to:
A) Find a place to live, figure out leasing terms (3 days)
B) Get our stuff delivered and unpacked (2 days)
C) Get everything set up (utilities, cable, household goods) (3 days)
And now I get a chance to really enjoy not working. But it's been odd. The past few days have not been filled with much on the "to-do" list. And when they're not (like Thursday will be) the days last what feels like an entire summer.
And I was thinking about this earlier tonight. About how while we work (for those that just hope to get through most days and can't wait to get off or get to the weekend) we count the hours, the minutes. And then as soon as we do get off work we fill our afternoons and evenings, and weekends with so many activities and events that are planned - it feels like there's never enough time.
I used to do little *fist pumps* every time I'd reach a time milestone during my workday. I'd look up and I'd be 3 hours in to my shift. Almost halfway, and then all of a sudden it was an hour past lunch and the hard part was over. On a larger scale as each week wore on I couldn't hurry it along fast enough. By Thursday I was so forward looking to the weekend that many of those mornings I woke up thinking it was Friday.
So to come out of that constant pushing forward to the weekend to a point now where tomorrow isn't that big of a deal to me - it's almost how I felt every summer after school. Waking up that 2nd week of summer break and realizing that I didn't have to go in to school that morning. Nor did I have any homework that was due. I wonder if this is what retirement feels like too - I've tried to pry my dad's real feelings out of him about retiring but he seems to be enjoying it.
Maybe after working for so many years it's that much sweeter. And it's probably because I know that I have to work sometime in the near future (in order to afford our lives) that's nagging on me and not allowing me to fully enjoy my money for nothing.
I can't remember the last time I didn't do any "work" for an entire month. We'll see how much longer this lasts.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Back on the DI
It's weird, but it feels like I was coming home.
As soon as I saw that bridge - smelled the factory and looked out across the river I thought to myself, It's good to be back.
But, I suppose that's what most people would feel after seeing 2,800 miles of unfamiliar.
We took a different route this time down. Last time we took the route that was the shortest. Compared to the route we took this time, it is also the most boring.
Well, maybe I'm just saying that because we spend 2 nights in the most interesting city on our way - a city I had never been to before but had heard was awesome - Chicago.
I was expecting it to be good. Definitely up there with my other favorite cities. But the way I set it up for myself and the way it surpassed my expectations were all very surprising.
After being stuck in traffic for about 40 minutes heading in to the city - even at 11 am - suddenly the road opened up as soon as we were heading downtown. It was almost as if the city said, "Let these guys in already" and as soon as we started moving I knew this had to have a soundtrack. So of course I turned on "Homecoming" by Kanye. I don't care how cheesy anyone else thinks that song is - I love it because I remember the first time I heard it. Thinking, "Ok, this song is about some girl right? Some baby mama that he left in his hometown." And by the end of it realizing, "Huh, that was actually pretty smart." Props Kanye. You provided a perfect soundtrack for driving in to downtown.
In 1 day we did as much sight seeing as we could do. Unfortunately our hotel (The Westin) made us sign a waiver that we wouldn't leave the dog on her own without anyone else in the room. So because of that we had to take her with us - everywhere we went. I was afraid she wasn't going to make it - sure the dog can probably run 6 miles (we take her on 3 mile+ runs every now and then) but walking around the city for 7 hours? I'm not sure she would make it.
Remember those Family Circus cartoons where little Billy is walking all over the yard and getting in to and out of things? Let me see if I can do that on google maps and get everyone a trail of what we did:
View Larger Map
Start at the Westin (A), end at Buckingham Fountain(G). All told almost 8 miles. Including 2 boat taxis, 1 boat architecture tour, some shopping on the magnificent mile, hot dogs and italian beef sandwiches at Portillo's, and then more sightseeing at Millenium Park. And the whole time the dog was right there, walking right beside us. Sure she took a nap, and yes she got lots of food and water along the way, but for every one stride I make she takes 4. So maybe that's what was so impressive about Chicago - is that my dog kept up with us.
In all seriousness though, Chicago is probably in my top 3 of most beautiful cities I've ever seen. It's almost like if you took NYC, got rid of a lot of the bums and the trash and the crazy people and replace them with large concrete flower boxes and a river that basically creates a large canal running throughout the city? Then you have Chicago.
The wife even said that she wouldn't mind living there. And that's pretty rare for her to admit something like that.
Enough about Chicago though - and just as a side note and totally out of chronological order of our trip. Our 2nd stop on our drive across the country was in Sioux Falls, SD. After stopping in Rapid City last year I wasn't too keen on stopping in South Dakota again - but the next stop would've made our 2nd day of driving a 15 hour day after we had driven 12 hours on our first day to get to Billings MT. Not going to happen.
As soon as we got settled in our hotel we went out for a run in the neighborhood behind the hotel. Here's how you can make an impression for your entire city on people who aren't from there. Wave hello at complete strangers who are on a run and ask them how they are doing. After exchanging niceties with a complete stranger who looked like he was just finishing up mowing his lawn we decided that Sioux Falls had, "Very nice people." And that's all it took - was just that one person to say hello. And of course all the friendly people we met at Red Lobster that night too.
After Chicago we drove down to Knoxville. The original plan was to stop in Louisville but as soon as we got there we both felt like we had at least another few hours of driving in us. Looking back on it I think it was a bit of a mistake because Knoxville was small. And kind of odd. It felt like a ghost town but there were people there. It felt like a ghost town because they had the "old town" of Knoxville and then they had the new town. And in the new town there were plenty of buildings that were empty and for lease. And in the middle of town is where it seemed like everyone was congregating. Everywhere else - there was just no one. Knoxville = weird.
One of my favorite drives to take though is along the Bourbon trail in Kentucky. After days of driving through miles of straightaway where you can see the road ahead for almost 10 miles (I picked out landmarks to see how far my eyes could see and then measured them - yes this is how bored I was driving through big sky country) driving those twisty roads through green trees and then heading up in to the smokey mountains was amazing. I think I'm definitely going to make it a point to stop in that area in the future.
After days of driving, our last drive from Knoxville to Charleston went by so quickly. And although it took us a few days to find a place to live for at least the next 6 months, I'm happy to be back on the island. Yes it is a little "Stepford Wives" as a friend of mine puts it, but so is the area I'm from back in Seattle. Plus on the island I believe that people care about their community, whereas in a larger city I think people can lose sight of that.
Tonight as I was walking the dog I looked up in to a gorgeous sunset on the best night (weather wise) we've had out here since we arrived here last week and I saw the Charleston flag displayed for me in it's natural state in the evening sky. A waxing crescent moon perched high above a palmetto tree. So happy to be back and I am excited to share with those coming to visit.
As soon as I saw that bridge - smelled the factory and looked out across the river I thought to myself, It's good to be back.
But, I suppose that's what most people would feel after seeing 2,800 miles of unfamiliar.
We took a different route this time down. Last time we took the route that was the shortest. Compared to the route we took this time, it is also the most boring.
Well, maybe I'm just saying that because we spend 2 nights in the most interesting city on our way - a city I had never been to before but had heard was awesome - Chicago.
I was expecting it to be good. Definitely up there with my other favorite cities. But the way I set it up for myself and the way it surpassed my expectations were all very surprising.
After being stuck in traffic for about 40 minutes heading in to the city - even at 11 am - suddenly the road opened up as soon as we were heading downtown. It was almost as if the city said, "Let these guys in already" and as soon as we started moving I knew this had to have a soundtrack. So of course I turned on "Homecoming" by Kanye. I don't care how cheesy anyone else thinks that song is - I love it because I remember the first time I heard it. Thinking, "Ok, this song is about some girl right? Some baby mama that he left in his hometown." And by the end of it realizing, "Huh, that was actually pretty smart." Props Kanye. You provided a perfect soundtrack for driving in to downtown.
In 1 day we did as much sight seeing as we could do. Unfortunately our hotel (The Westin) made us sign a waiver that we wouldn't leave the dog on her own without anyone else in the room. So because of that we had to take her with us - everywhere we went. I was afraid she wasn't going to make it - sure the dog can probably run 6 miles (we take her on 3 mile+ runs every now and then) but walking around the city for 7 hours? I'm not sure she would make it.
Remember those Family Circus cartoons where little Billy is walking all over the yard and getting in to and out of things? Let me see if I can do that on google maps and get everyone a trail of what we did:
View Larger Map
Start at the Westin (A), end at Buckingham Fountain(G). All told almost 8 miles. Including 2 boat taxis, 1 boat architecture tour, some shopping on the magnificent mile, hot dogs and italian beef sandwiches at Portillo's, and then more sightseeing at Millenium Park. And the whole time the dog was right there, walking right beside us. Sure she took a nap, and yes she got lots of food and water along the way, but for every one stride I make she takes 4. So maybe that's what was so impressive about Chicago - is that my dog kept up with us.
In all seriousness though, Chicago is probably in my top 3 of most beautiful cities I've ever seen. It's almost like if you took NYC, got rid of a lot of the bums and the trash and the crazy people and replace them with large concrete flower boxes and a river that basically creates a large canal running throughout the city? Then you have Chicago.
The wife even said that she wouldn't mind living there. And that's pretty rare for her to admit something like that.
Enough about Chicago though - and just as a side note and totally out of chronological order of our trip. Our 2nd stop on our drive across the country was in Sioux Falls, SD. After stopping in Rapid City last year I wasn't too keen on stopping in South Dakota again - but the next stop would've made our 2nd day of driving a 15 hour day after we had driven 12 hours on our first day to get to Billings MT. Not going to happen.
As soon as we got settled in our hotel we went out for a run in the neighborhood behind the hotel. Here's how you can make an impression for your entire city on people who aren't from there. Wave hello at complete strangers who are on a run and ask them how they are doing. After exchanging niceties with a complete stranger who looked like he was just finishing up mowing his lawn we decided that Sioux Falls had, "Very nice people." And that's all it took - was just that one person to say hello. And of course all the friendly people we met at Red Lobster that night too.
After Chicago we drove down to Knoxville. The original plan was to stop in Louisville but as soon as we got there we both felt like we had at least another few hours of driving in us. Looking back on it I think it was a bit of a mistake because Knoxville was small. And kind of odd. It felt like a ghost town but there were people there. It felt like a ghost town because they had the "old town" of Knoxville and then they had the new town. And in the new town there were plenty of buildings that were empty and for lease. And in the middle of town is where it seemed like everyone was congregating. Everywhere else - there was just no one. Knoxville = weird.
One of my favorite drives to take though is along the Bourbon trail in Kentucky. After days of driving through miles of straightaway where you can see the road ahead for almost 10 miles (I picked out landmarks to see how far my eyes could see and then measured them - yes this is how bored I was driving through big sky country) driving those twisty roads through green trees and then heading up in to the smokey mountains was amazing. I think I'm definitely going to make it a point to stop in that area in the future.
After days of driving, our last drive from Knoxville to Charleston went by so quickly. And although it took us a few days to find a place to live for at least the next 6 months, I'm happy to be back on the island. Yes it is a little "Stepford Wives" as a friend of mine puts it, but so is the area I'm from back in Seattle. Plus on the island I believe that people care about their community, whereas in a larger city I think people can lose sight of that.
Tonight as I was walking the dog I looked up in to a gorgeous sunset on the best night (weather wise) we've had out here since we arrived here last week and I saw the Charleston flag displayed for me in it's natural state in the evening sky. A waxing crescent moon perched high above a palmetto tree. So happy to be back and I am excited to share with those coming to visit.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Why it's not over yet...
Reasons why the stock market and everyone who is so optimistic on the whole economy might be taking a turn down the path of unhappiness once again:
-Companies reporting earnings numbers based on cost cutting (layoffs/office closures) vs. top line revenue growth. You can slash and burn a lot of things, but if you continue to lose revenue (in a lot of cases a 70%+ year over year difference) sooner or later there won't be any revenue to pay the employees you have left. A growing economy is not one that continues to cut it's workers to make (or beat) analyst's estimates.
-10% unemployment or more in 15 states as of today. And soon many unemployment benefits will expire. Think of all the workers who have been living off unemployment, slowly running out of time to find a new job. Soon enough even their $300 a week will be gone too. Then it becomes a matter of survival. What do you pay for? Food is always first. Everything else is not necessary. More houses become vacant. More credit cards unpaid. Less revenue generated for "luxury" goods - in even this case anything that is not edible. And what do we get from this?
-Downward spiral with commercial mortgages. Every day I cringe at the sight of the big "FOR LEASE" signs. All of those strip malls out there. Heck, even all of those actual malls. Those were big investments for someone - for some company. And when that domino effect starts (which it already has begun), watch out. Let's take one of your local malls. I'm sure plenty of us have them near us and know what kind of stores are in them - many of which you've always wondered how they remained in business. Guess what? Some of them may be out of business soon if they are not already out of business. Mrs. Field's cookies become a luxury. No one sees the point of pretzels from Auntie Anne's (and actually can find the recipe online). iTunes, Amazon and even Walmart continue to dominate stores like FYE, Gamestop, Barnes and Noble, Borders. And those last two companies take up a lot of space which costs them a lot of money in the form of a lease. And as soon as that rent stops getting paid, the owner of the mall cannot continue to take the loss on their multi-million dollar property...who's going to be left holding the bag on that one again?
Probably us, the tax payers. Which brings me to my last reason why this isn't close to being over yet...
-Politicians still unable to agree on anything - we're seeing the same old gridlock as we always haev in the past. In my opinion nothing has changed except the talking head on TV. The stimulus is a joke. I laugh every time I see an ad for Cash for Clunkers - although for at least the last month things will look rosy just because of an incentive that tax payers are paying for anyway. Driving down to Charleston I saw a lot of "stimulus projects". Lots of roadwork. Yes, many of the roads we drove on needed a little work. But were they bearable? Absolutely. Couldn't this money have been spent somewhere better? I don't think I-90 needed to be completely repaved. The whole health care situation is a mess. States like California are basically bankrupt - I heard a story where they were considering releasing thousands of inmates to cut their budget. Absolutely hilarious. I can already sense the wave turning on all that "Hope for Change." Things could get ugly in regards to our talking heads pretty soon.
-Statistics lie. In June there was a .5% increase from month to month in the Case Schiller home price index, (meaning that home prices actually increased from June to July) however if you really drilled down on that number there was actually a 17% decline in prices since last July. So you're telling me that across this nation that homeowners lost almost 20% of the value in their homes? Some homes out there which have already lost that much over last year? Some homes (like my parent's house) which was completely paid off and they just continue to lose that equity? How must each person who goes to the market to offload what is now a depreciating asset - how terrible must they feel to take a loss on something they've dumped years of hard work in to? Sickening.
-Inflation hasn't even hit yet. All of these dollars to "stimulate" the economy have to go somewhere right? I give it 3-5 years assuming we continue down this path. Imagine gas over $6 a gallon. The oil companies have to continue to make their money too. And yes - I forgot, there is "alternative energy", but remember it's much easier to build/service a solar panel/wind farm than it is to constantly be mining for coal or drilling for oil. More jobs lost (although we've been told that this green revolution will create more jobs - I'll believe it when I see it).
-Of course all this bad news sets us up for what I'm assuming will be the worst retail Christmas ever. Because that is what counts. What happens when you have an economy based off of 70% consumers - meaning they actually consume things - who back off their spending by even 10%? Disaster. I even looked around at Old Navy today and saw 3 moms shopping with their kids for what I'm assuming was back to school stuff. 5 years ago I would've had to squeeze past shoppers in the aisles, wait for a fitting room and then wait once again to purchase my old navy performance fleece. Now? *crickets*
Currently I'm still in the mode of "cautiously optimistic" for the US. However, over the next few months (possibly until late 2010) the ugliness is more than likely going to continue.
-Companies reporting earnings numbers based on cost cutting (layoffs/office closures) vs. top line revenue growth. You can slash and burn a lot of things, but if you continue to lose revenue (in a lot of cases a 70%+ year over year difference) sooner or later there won't be any revenue to pay the employees you have left. A growing economy is not one that continues to cut it's workers to make (or beat) analyst's estimates.
-10% unemployment or more in 15 states as of today. And soon many unemployment benefits will expire. Think of all the workers who have been living off unemployment, slowly running out of time to find a new job. Soon enough even their $300 a week will be gone too. Then it becomes a matter of survival. What do you pay for? Food is always first. Everything else is not necessary. More houses become vacant. More credit cards unpaid. Less revenue generated for "luxury" goods - in even this case anything that is not edible. And what do we get from this?
-Downward spiral with commercial mortgages. Every day I cringe at the sight of the big "FOR LEASE" signs. All of those strip malls out there. Heck, even all of those actual malls. Those were big investments for someone - for some company. And when that domino effect starts (which it already has begun), watch out. Let's take one of your local malls. I'm sure plenty of us have them near us and know what kind of stores are in them - many of which you've always wondered how they remained in business. Guess what? Some of them may be out of business soon if they are not already out of business. Mrs. Field's cookies become a luxury. No one sees the point of pretzels from Auntie Anne's (and actually can find the recipe online). iTunes, Amazon and even Walmart continue to dominate stores like FYE, Gamestop, Barnes and Noble, Borders. And those last two companies take up a lot of space which costs them a lot of money in the form of a lease. And as soon as that rent stops getting paid, the owner of the mall cannot continue to take the loss on their multi-million dollar property...who's going to be left holding the bag on that one again?
Probably us, the tax payers. Which brings me to my last reason why this isn't close to being over yet...
-Politicians still unable to agree on anything - we're seeing the same old gridlock as we always haev in the past. In my opinion nothing has changed except the talking head on TV. The stimulus is a joke. I laugh every time I see an ad for Cash for Clunkers - although for at least the last month things will look rosy just because of an incentive that tax payers are paying for anyway. Driving down to Charleston I saw a lot of "stimulus projects". Lots of roadwork. Yes, many of the roads we drove on needed a little work. But were they bearable? Absolutely. Couldn't this money have been spent somewhere better? I don't think I-90 needed to be completely repaved. The whole health care situation is a mess. States like California are basically bankrupt - I heard a story where they were considering releasing thousands of inmates to cut their budget. Absolutely hilarious. I can already sense the wave turning on all that "Hope for Change." Things could get ugly in regards to our talking heads pretty soon.
-Statistics lie. In June there was a .5% increase from month to month in the Case Schiller home price index, (meaning that home prices actually increased from June to July) however if you really drilled down on that number there was actually a 17% decline in prices since last July. So you're telling me that across this nation that homeowners lost almost 20% of the value in their homes? Some homes out there which have already lost that much over last year? Some homes (like my parent's house) which was completely paid off and they just continue to lose that equity? How must each person who goes to the market to offload what is now a depreciating asset - how terrible must they feel to take a loss on something they've dumped years of hard work in to? Sickening.
-Inflation hasn't even hit yet. All of these dollars to "stimulate" the economy have to go somewhere right? I give it 3-5 years assuming we continue down this path. Imagine gas over $6 a gallon. The oil companies have to continue to make their money too. And yes - I forgot, there is "alternative energy", but remember it's much easier to build/service a solar panel/wind farm than it is to constantly be mining for coal or drilling for oil. More jobs lost (although we've been told that this green revolution will create more jobs - I'll believe it when I see it).
-Of course all this bad news sets us up for what I'm assuming will be the worst retail Christmas ever. Because that is what counts. What happens when you have an economy based off of 70% consumers - meaning they actually consume things - who back off their spending by even 10%? Disaster. I even looked around at Old Navy today and saw 3 moms shopping with their kids for what I'm assuming was back to school stuff. 5 years ago I would've had to squeeze past shoppers in the aisles, wait for a fitting room and then wait once again to purchase my old navy performance fleece. Now? *crickets*
Currently I'm still in the mode of "cautiously optimistic" for the US. However, over the next few months (possibly until late 2010) the ugliness is more than likely going to continue.
Saturday, August 08, 2009
Sweet Sorrow
I can't say it any better.
So I'm just going to steal it.
In less than 48 hours I am going to be starting the long journey that is driving across the country once again.
Unfortunately for me, there were no sweet enough offers for me to stay. But, in all reality I never really tried as hard as I should have.
I think it was the combination of knowing that we were more than likely going to be leaving once again and also the terrible state of the economy that contributed to my lack of drive for finding something in Seattle. I hope it doesn't carry over - but I don't think it will.
I'm sitting right now in what is basically an empty house. They took everything we needed - furniture, housewares, clothes. And now I am living out of a suitcase. In my own house. I'd love if we could get on the road right now, but I've got some extra things to do before we leave. Unfortunately family wasn't available to say their last goodbyes and I've got 2 more softball games I'd like to play in to basically end my Seattle summer.
And that's another sad part about leaving. Everything is always, "Last" - for at least the next 6 months. This is the last time I'll eat teriyaki. This is the last time I'll play basketball with this group of guys. This is the last time I'll be taking the dog on a walk through our neighborhood.
When you put a spin like that on things - everything becomes important. Intense. More beautiful than you've ever seen it before. You recognize things that for the past 9 months you just would walk by. Suddenly the leaves rustling in the breeze have now become art to you. Because you know it's going to be some time before you see them again. I hold on - I savor it as much as I can. Take it all in.
Because once I'm on that road again - all I've got are pictures and memories.
I honestly thought I would be much more excited to leave than I am right now. Maybe it's the lack of job that's hurting me. Or maybe it's the memories of all the good times I had back home while I was here.
Life keeps moving on, so I'll try my best not to frown on great times from the recent past and be welcome to new opportunities sure to come my way.
So I'm just going to steal it.
In less than 48 hours I am going to be starting the long journey that is driving across the country once again.
Unfortunately for me, there were no sweet enough offers for me to stay. But, in all reality I never really tried as hard as I should have.
I think it was the combination of knowing that we were more than likely going to be leaving once again and also the terrible state of the economy that contributed to my lack of drive for finding something in Seattle. I hope it doesn't carry over - but I don't think it will.
I'm sitting right now in what is basically an empty house. They took everything we needed - furniture, housewares, clothes. And now I am living out of a suitcase. In my own house. I'd love if we could get on the road right now, but I've got some extra things to do before we leave. Unfortunately family wasn't available to say their last goodbyes and I've got 2 more softball games I'd like to play in to basically end my Seattle summer.
And that's another sad part about leaving. Everything is always, "Last" - for at least the next 6 months. This is the last time I'll eat teriyaki. This is the last time I'll play basketball with this group of guys. This is the last time I'll be taking the dog on a walk through our neighborhood.
When you put a spin like that on things - everything becomes important. Intense. More beautiful than you've ever seen it before. You recognize things that for the past 9 months you just would walk by. Suddenly the leaves rustling in the breeze have now become art to you. Because you know it's going to be some time before you see them again. I hold on - I savor it as much as I can. Take it all in.
Because once I'm on that road again - all I've got are pictures and memories.
I honestly thought I would be much more excited to leave than I am right now. Maybe it's the lack of job that's hurting me. Or maybe it's the memories of all the good times I had back home while I was here.
Life keeps moving on, so I'll try my best not to frown on great times from the recent past and be welcome to new opportunities sure to come my way.
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