I didn't want to go to sleep yet. It is too early.
Plus my allergies are acting up so I'm going to stay awake until I feel like I've got them under control.
Besides, if I go to bed now, assuming my normal 7 hours of sleep I would be waking up at 6 am tomorrow. And I don't want to wake up at 6 am. I want to wake up at at least 7:30 am at the earliest. But I know that won't happen. I'll probably be up at 7 am. Ah well, what's another 30 minutes?
And I am going to post this in August. Because I didn't get a chance to write my 4th post in August because of the vacation I took.
So here goes my imagination...
Murphy stood there, hands grimy from all the oil and car parts he had been working with all day. On his hips, they smudged off a bit of the crap on to his uniform. Looking across the garage and out in to the world he could see the storm front rolling in. And when he looked up again it was like God had tipped over the bucket and was trying to create another river where his business stood...or maybe an ocean.
Damn this hurricane season he thought to himself as he shook his head in disgust.
The storms down here in Georgia had been frequent, but luckily not as strong as they had seen a few years ago. In a way he kind of enjoyed the fact that a few more storms and hurricanes would be rolling in over the next 2 weeks because he knew what it meant for his business. Plenty of flooded engines. Damaged cars from falling trees, hail storms and just plain old bad weather driving.
22 years ago he had taken over the business from his father - rest his soul - after he had come down with lung cancer. And even to this day Murphy was still trying to break the habit himself.
Guess it's time for a smoke break.
Looking behind him standing under the section of the porch that somehow didn't get wet in even the craziest sideways rain he smiled and thought about how this business had grown from just helping out a few friends and neighbors with their vehicles to now the largest and most reputable car service company in town. They did everything from oil changes and tire rotations to full on body work and engine repair. He understood he was a big fish in a little pond, but he liked it that way. People knew and respected him in town and he wouldn't have had it any other way.
"Hey Murph!" shouted a voice from behind him.
"Yeah?"
"Hey bud, think I'm gonna be headin' out of here before the road washes out." Jim said to Murphy as he pulled on his coat and patted him on the back. "Don't you think you should get goin' yourself?"
"Yeah, just wanted to see if this wall of water was going to break any time soon..." his voice trailed off as the drops beat down harder on the pavement almost in mocking fashion of what Murphy had just said.
"Alright buddy, I'll see you maybe tomorrow then?"
"For sure. Oh and don't bother coming in if it's like this tomorrow too. I'm sure we'll have plenty to do when this weather clears up."
"Can't wait." Jim said chuckling, knowing full well if he wasn't going to come in tomorrow there was going to be some overtime to make up for it.
Author's note: I can't decide how I want to end this short story. I can end it like it is...almost as if it's just an open ended story. Normal end of work conversation.
I was thinking I could end it like this:
Alternate ending: Little did Jim know that those were the last words he would ever say to Murphy.
Author's note: But I think that was a little bit harsh - plus I think even I would want to know what had happened to Murphy in that storm on the way home. And really, I'm not a big fan of trying to come up with something that seems normal yet interesting enough. And the story could really go from a short one to a medium one given that I continued writing. So to prevent that I'll leave it open ended.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
A Mediocre Life
...Is not one that I want to live.
And yet I can't help but feel that I've fell in to that comfortable - somewhat mediocre life.
Yes, I suppose I could make the argument that I've got a very good life. I'm healthy, I have a lot of fun and I don't have any other major issues in my life.
But what's been bothering me the past week are a few things.
I recently read a questionnaire given to hundreds of elderly people in retirement homes.
And they continued to see the same recurring theme in each of the answers. It wasn't that people regretted anything in their lives...but that they regretted not doing more. Not doing what they always wanted to with their lives. Not following their dreams.
So I've been questioning myself over the past week (like I've been known to do). Am I pursuing my dreams? Am I doing everything possible in my life to make it my best life possible?
I am uneasy about the response. But that stems from the fact that I'm not sure what my dreams are.
I have the early retirement goal. Which is definitely an ambitious goal and I feel that I am doing my best to complete it.
But other than that? What do I see as my "dream life"? Anything that I would want to do for the rest of my life, even given the assumption that I could anything I wanted to - somehow ends up down the road of mediocrity. I am definitely a creature of routine. Routine is my comfort though. I seek it out. And really the day in, day out is something that actually is part of my dream life - I just haven't realized it yet.
I think about the people I know and love. I can only think of maybe 1 or 2 people who are "living their dream". But it's not even really that. It's more that they had a career goal growing up or going through college, and they've seen the career through to fruition. Are they really enjoying their life that much more than me? That's arguable.
So that's where I sit right now. The question might be too large for me right now. But it might be a question for everyone reading this right now. What are your dreams? If you could have any life right now what would it look like? I am unsure about mine - and I am not sure if I will ever be sure.
And yet I can't help but feel that I've fell in to that comfortable - somewhat mediocre life.
Yes, I suppose I could make the argument that I've got a very good life. I'm healthy, I have a lot of fun and I don't have any other major issues in my life.
But what's been bothering me the past week are a few things.
I recently read a questionnaire given to hundreds of elderly people in retirement homes.
And they continued to see the same recurring theme in each of the answers. It wasn't that people regretted anything in their lives...but that they regretted not doing more. Not doing what they always wanted to with their lives. Not following their dreams.
So I've been questioning myself over the past week (like I've been known to do). Am I pursuing my dreams? Am I doing everything possible in my life to make it my best life possible?
I am uneasy about the response. But that stems from the fact that I'm not sure what my dreams are.
I have the early retirement goal. Which is definitely an ambitious goal and I feel that I am doing my best to complete it.
But other than that? What do I see as my "dream life"? Anything that I would want to do for the rest of my life, even given the assumption that I could anything I wanted to - somehow ends up down the road of mediocrity. I am definitely a creature of routine. Routine is my comfort though. I seek it out. And really the day in, day out is something that actually is part of my dream life - I just haven't realized it yet.
I think about the people I know and love. I can only think of maybe 1 or 2 people who are "living their dream". But it's not even really that. It's more that they had a career goal growing up or going through college, and they've seen the career through to fruition. Are they really enjoying their life that much more than me? That's arguable.
So that's where I sit right now. The question might be too large for me right now. But it might be a question for everyone reading this right now. What are your dreams? If you could have any life right now what would it look like? I am unsure about mine - and I am not sure if I will ever be sure.
Monday, August 18, 2008
The Moosey Star
Thump Thump Thump Thump Thump Thump
BOOM
Thump Thump Thump Thump Thump Thump
BOOM CRASH
This is the sound that I hear throughout the day. Sometimes well in to the early morning.
This is the sound of the Moosey Star.
Moosey Star: Noun. A tall woman with big bones, typically overweight. See Belgian Womens Volleyball Player.
The Moosey Star is amazing. I am not sure if she works at all. I am sure that she is insane. I forgot what it was like to live in a multiple unit building. It sucks. She lives right above my office our bedroom and our main bathroom.
The Moosey Star likes to pace around her house. I think she has wood floors and wears steel heeled boots. Yes. On the heel. To ruin her wood floors.
She likes to "pace" back and forth. And by "pace" I actually mean march around her house, waking me up at 2 in the morning and annoying me throughout my work day.
If there is ONE thing that I hate about living out here, it is her.
I have a few theories about what she is doing though.
-She has a very strict work out/cardio regimen which requires her to work out every 4 hours, even if that means waking up at 2 in the morning and bouncing around.
-She has a lot of cockroaches in her house that she enjoys stomping on.
-She is like Adam Sandler in the movie "Reign Over Me" constantly redoing one of the rooms in her house. Because there are times where I hear her thumps followed by a large CRASH almost as if she had dropped a large table.
-She has OCD and cannot do anything properly without taking the same steps throughout her house over and over.
-She is terrible at jump roping and is not getting better. She falls every time after 5 or 6 jumps. But one day she'll make it to 10 in a row. She'll show all those kids in school that made fun of her.
-She has a mild form of dementia where she is always looking for something and thinking she left it in the other room. Only to turn back around to think she left it in the room she just left. Frustrated, she bangs her feet in to the ground each step she takes.
-She had her feet cut off in a freak roller coaster accident (or maybe while she was a prisoner of war?) and has to move around on stumps. The sheer weight of her 250 pound body pressing down on such a small surface area creates the BOOM noise every time she steps.
-She is trying to memorize all the steps from "Stomp the Yard". Her favorite movie of all time.
-She is part of a Native American tribe and is constantly practicing. But that I have actually heard before (amazingly on a floor above me) and it sounds nothing like this.
-She likes to annoy us.
So on nights like tonight where she has been stomping around for the past 2 hours (and I'm sure will be going on well in to the night) I've decided to take it upon myself to give her a little wake up call from below the next morning.
It gives me a little satisfaction. In my passive aggressive ways...
When I hear that she is up at 2 and 3 in the morning, I make sure to wake up with the Wife at 6 AM and blast the TV. And when the TV is too loud for me I turn on the music. And I let it run for a few hours. I take the dog for a walk for about half the time the music is blaring and the rest of the time I'm downstairs (and like MY MUSIC LOUD) so I don't mind it so much. Sometimes I let my phone alarm just ring...and ring...and ring...because it is the loudest and most annoying sound on my phone, and doesn't stop until I turn it off.
I've heard her stomping around...more forcefully than usual when I've got my volume up. And in my own little twisted way, it gives me satisfaction. I hear her sometimes during the day, sometimes in the middle of the night. I've begun to think that she doesn't work...nor does she ever leave the house. A normal person does not move around their house that much. I would say in a 30 minute period she will move back and forth across her house about 50 times. Yes. It is that bad. What person does that? Who doesn't sit down and take a load off? You're supposed to relax when you're at home...Or at least that's what I do...
This Moosey Star is definitely a head case. Some days and nights are worse than others (isn't that what they say about people with mental illness?). If she was at her worst every day? I'd probably be up there banging around with her and lose my mind as well.
Love thy neighbors? How about making each of us as miserable as possible?
Tomorrow is going to be another Rage Against the Machine morning for me it sounds like...I wonder if she likes it? I shudder at the thought...
BOOM
Thump Thump Thump Thump Thump Thump
BOOM CRASH
This is the sound that I hear throughout the day. Sometimes well in to the early morning.
This is the sound of the Moosey Star.
Moosey Star: Noun. A tall woman with big bones, typically overweight. See Belgian Womens Volleyball Player.
The Moosey Star is amazing. I am not sure if she works at all. I am sure that she is insane. I forgot what it was like to live in a multiple unit building. It sucks. She lives right above my office our bedroom and our main bathroom.
The Moosey Star likes to pace around her house. I think she has wood floors and wears steel heeled boots. Yes. On the heel. To ruin her wood floors.
She likes to "pace" back and forth. And by "pace" I actually mean march around her house, waking me up at 2 in the morning and annoying me throughout my work day.
If there is ONE thing that I hate about living out here, it is her.
I have a few theories about what she is doing though.
-She has a very strict work out/cardio regimen which requires her to work out every 4 hours, even if that means waking up at 2 in the morning and bouncing around.
-She has a lot of cockroaches in her house that she enjoys stomping on.
-She is like Adam Sandler in the movie "Reign Over Me" constantly redoing one of the rooms in her house. Because there are times where I hear her thumps followed by a large CRASH almost as if she had dropped a large table.
-She has OCD and cannot do anything properly without taking the same steps throughout her house over and over.
-She is terrible at jump roping and is not getting better. She falls every time after 5 or 6 jumps. But one day she'll make it to 10 in a row. She'll show all those kids in school that made fun of her.
-She has a mild form of dementia where she is always looking for something and thinking she left it in the other room. Only to turn back around to think she left it in the room she just left. Frustrated, she bangs her feet in to the ground each step she takes.
-She had her feet cut off in a freak roller coaster accident (or maybe while she was a prisoner of war?) and has to move around on stumps. The sheer weight of her 250 pound body pressing down on such a small surface area creates the BOOM noise every time she steps.
-She is trying to memorize all the steps from "Stomp the Yard". Her favorite movie of all time.
-She is part of a Native American tribe and is constantly practicing. But that I have actually heard before (amazingly on a floor above me) and it sounds nothing like this.
-She likes to annoy us.
So on nights like tonight where she has been stomping around for the past 2 hours (and I'm sure will be going on well in to the night) I've decided to take it upon myself to give her a little wake up call from below the next morning.
It gives me a little satisfaction. In my passive aggressive ways...
When I hear that she is up at 2 and 3 in the morning, I make sure to wake up with the Wife at 6 AM and blast the TV. And when the TV is too loud for me I turn on the music. And I let it run for a few hours. I take the dog for a walk for about half the time the music is blaring and the rest of the time I'm downstairs (and like MY MUSIC LOUD) so I don't mind it so much. Sometimes I let my phone alarm just ring...and ring...and ring...because it is the loudest and most annoying sound on my phone, and doesn't stop until I turn it off.
I've heard her stomping around...more forcefully than usual when I've got my volume up. And in my own little twisted way, it gives me satisfaction. I hear her sometimes during the day, sometimes in the middle of the night. I've begun to think that she doesn't work...nor does she ever leave the house. A normal person does not move around their house that much. I would say in a 30 minute period she will move back and forth across her house about 50 times. Yes. It is that bad. What person does that? Who doesn't sit down and take a load off? You're supposed to relax when you're at home...Or at least that's what I do...
This Moosey Star is definitely a head case. Some days and nights are worse than others (isn't that what they say about people with mental illness?). If she was at her worst every day? I'd probably be up there banging around with her and lose my mind as well.
Love thy neighbors? How about making each of us as miserable as possible?
Tomorrow is going to be another Rage Against the Machine morning for me it sounds like...I wonder if she likes it? I shudder at the thought...
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
"Largest Up Move in 4 Months Time"
Warning: This post will be about the market.
If you find that boring, or don't want to read about it, or have no idea about some of the things I'm talking about then I'd recommend going for a run. I heard the weather's supposed to be nice wherever you are.
Today the Dow was up over 330 points, the S&P was up almost 30 points. Almost all of the US indices rallied 3%. It was a huge day.
And I did nothing but lose money. Almost $2K to be exact.
Now that doesn't seem like much, and I've definitely had a lot bigger losing days in the past, but it's capped off a pretty bad week for me where I've lost a nice chunk of change swinging from profitability this year to negativity.
And the emotion from losing can snowball sometimes. Especially because after the market closed I imagined my dad calling me about it (because he knows I follow the market pretty closely). My mom actually did end up calling this afternoon, but she didn't mention anything about the market.
Here was my imaginary phone conversation with my dad:
Dad: Hey boy!
Me: Sup
Dad: You see that market today?
Me: Yeah
Dad: Well? Did you make any money?
Me: No, I actually lost $2K
Dad: What? How?
Me: You wouldn't understand...
Dad: Ayyyeee...well you'll get it back
Me: I hope so
The shift was slow in coming. And I'm not really sure if the "shift" has completely taken place yet. It was the rotation out of commodities and back in to other things. Tech. Financials. Retail. Anything that had been beaten down with the rest of the market. And it was time to beat up the things that hadn't. So while the market was rallying my favorite stock of the past 6 months - Potash - was falling off a cliff once again after a big down move yesterday.
And there I was, catching the falling knife the entire time. Just 2 weeks ago, and for months before that, I was catching the falling knife on it, never knowing if it would break it's trend line. Luckily for me it never did. But as I sit here right now, the thing is broken. I had to get out. I had to take what I could.
Tomorrow I'm going to start over and try my best to rebuild. I've faced a similar situation to this a couple months ago. And I rebuilt it all only to see it disappear again.
So writing this out is almost acting like a bit of therapy for me. Stan from SB used to tell me that there are opportunities everyday. It's just a matter of finding them. And I also have to remember that it's a marathon. Not a sprint.
I just want to be rich yesterday. I want to have cash to burn because I've never been in that situation before. And I know that investing my money is one way to get to that point.
So I'm going to keep my head up, look back on this week as the point where I completely missed the sector rotation and got burned for it, and hopefully be more aware in the future so I can catch the next wave.
Back to work tomorrow.
If you find that boring, or don't want to read about it, or have no idea about some of the things I'm talking about then I'd recommend going for a run. I heard the weather's supposed to be nice wherever you are.
Today the Dow was up over 330 points, the S&P was up almost 30 points. Almost all of the US indices rallied 3%. It was a huge day.
And I did nothing but lose money. Almost $2K to be exact.
Now that doesn't seem like much, and I've definitely had a lot bigger losing days in the past, but it's capped off a pretty bad week for me where I've lost a nice chunk of change swinging from profitability this year to negativity.
And the emotion from losing can snowball sometimes. Especially because after the market closed I imagined my dad calling me about it (because he knows I follow the market pretty closely). My mom actually did end up calling this afternoon, but she didn't mention anything about the market.
Here was my imaginary phone conversation with my dad:
Dad: Hey boy!
Me: Sup
Dad: You see that market today?
Me: Yeah
Dad: Well? Did you make any money?
Me: No, I actually lost $2K
Dad: What? How?
Me: You wouldn't understand...
Dad: Ayyyeee...well you'll get it back
Me: I hope so
The shift was slow in coming. And I'm not really sure if the "shift" has completely taken place yet. It was the rotation out of commodities and back in to other things. Tech. Financials. Retail. Anything that had been beaten down with the rest of the market. And it was time to beat up the things that hadn't. So while the market was rallying my favorite stock of the past 6 months - Potash - was falling off a cliff once again after a big down move yesterday.
And there I was, catching the falling knife the entire time. Just 2 weeks ago, and for months before that, I was catching the falling knife on it, never knowing if it would break it's trend line. Luckily for me it never did. But as I sit here right now, the thing is broken. I had to get out. I had to take what I could.
Tomorrow I'm going to start over and try my best to rebuild. I've faced a similar situation to this a couple months ago. And I rebuilt it all only to see it disappear again.
So writing this out is almost acting like a bit of therapy for me. Stan from SB used to tell me that there are opportunities everyday. It's just a matter of finding them. And I also have to remember that it's a marathon. Not a sprint.
I just want to be rich yesterday. I want to have cash to burn because I've never been in that situation before. And I know that investing my money is one way to get to that point.
So I'm going to keep my head up, look back on this week as the point where I completely missed the sector rotation and got burned for it, and hopefully be more aware in the future so I can catch the next wave.
Back to work tomorrow.
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