Sweet Sorrow

I can't say it any better.

So I'm just going to steal it.

In less than 48 hours I am going to be starting the long journey that is driving across the country once again.

Unfortunately for me, there were no sweet enough offers for me to stay. But, in all reality I never really tried as hard as I should have.

I think it was the combination of knowing that we were more than likely going to be leaving once again and also the terrible state of the economy that contributed to my lack of drive for finding something in Seattle. I hope it doesn't carry over - but I don't think it will.

I'm sitting right now in what is basically an empty house. They took everything we needed - furniture, housewares, clothes. And now I am living out of a suitcase. In my own house. I'd love if we could get on the road right now, but I've got some extra things to do before we leave. Unfortunately family wasn't available to say their last goodbyes and I've got 2 more softball games I'd like to play in to basically end my Seattle summer.

And that's another sad part about leaving. Everything is always, "Last" - for at least the next 6 months. This is the last time I'll eat teriyaki. This is the last time I'll play basketball with this group of guys. This is the last time I'll be taking the dog on a walk through our neighborhood.

When you put a spin like that on things - everything becomes important. Intense. More beautiful than you've ever seen it before. You recognize things that for the past 9 months you just would walk by. Suddenly the leaves rustling in the breeze have now become art to you. Because you know it's going to be some time before you see them again. I hold on - I savor it as much as I can. Take it all in.

Because once I'm on that road again - all I've got are pictures and memories.

I honestly thought I would be much more excited to leave than I am right now. Maybe it's the lack of job that's hurting me. Or maybe it's the memories of all the good times I had back home while I was here.

Life keeps moving on, so I'll try my best not to frown on great times from the recent past and be welcome to new opportunities sure to come my way.