23...24

(This was supposed to be posted last night)

Last post before I turn 24

Let’s go over my year (in 15 minutes)

Big ones

Got a job that pays me almost what I feel is adequate. Got engaged. Bought a house.

Those are pretty big. I think this year has been very good. Turning point? Probably. But it was bound to happen anyway. I was waiting for it to come along. And it’s come.

So here I am. I’m giving myself (seriously for some reason) one more year to be a “mid 20’s” care-free type of dude. 25 is another turning point for me. I want to have children. But I don’t want them that soon. I’m thinking maybe 27? Then I’m 45 by the time my kids are in college? That sounds good. I should be making some good money by then. Wow. 18 years. I can’t imagine how much my life or this world will change in 18 years. Will we still be alive as a human race? Will I still be living in the most dominant and powerful country in the world? Will my kids even go to college? So many future questions, every single one of them lacking answers.

I’m banking on it. The future. But a scary thought to think that you might not be around even for the next 10 years. Why save? Why pay the mortgage? Why work? What a mind fuck.

Another day lost working OT. Trading my time for some dollars. April 11, 2006 come and gone. How many people were born today? How many died? Another drop in the ocean.

I am hoping 25 will be less stressful. I am hoping that after the wedding I can kind of hang out for the little bit. Not have anything but the bills hang over my head. Since 9th grade, the last time I didn’t work a summer, I’ve been saying to myself, “One of these summers, I’m just going to completely veg. Just completely be lazy, wake up whenever I want, do whatever I want to, hang out at the parks, the oceans, read books, barbecue and roast marshmallows over a campfire.” Hasn’t happened. Probably won’t happen for a while. That’s ok. The idea of it being a possibility for every weekend is enough for me.

My birthday. Then one of my favorite weekends of the year, the weekend I always make as “memorable as possible”. Then it’s here. Another summer.
I am praying it doesn’t rain this weekend. Hook me up a little, someone up there? If not, eh. Wasn’t meant to be. What a year though. It’s actually hard to write about because I am scared I would go on for at least…a year. But, work’s over. Gotta go now.