Rando Notes for July "Oh" Seven

I know.

I know that you’ve been dying for one of these. Well maybe not you specifically. Maybe you haven’t been following along. But if I know like I should, literally I think maybe five people follow what I write. So to those five out there, what you’ve been missing for the past two months…my lovely rando posts where I let my ADD run wild on MSFT Word to your moms I came to drop bombs I got more rhymes than the bible got psalms.

I don’t feel like notating each new point with a dash. So for this post I will just separate them by spaces. Here we go…

In the summer of 2005 I got sun burnt. At the time, I was shaving my head with the 1/8” guard (I believe the smallest guard I have available on my trusty Remington) so of course my scalp got burnt too. Embarrassed I avoided wearing black or dark colored shirts. Why? My scalp began to peel in nasty little dry skin increments – shut up I couldn’t find a better word for it. Since those days in 2005 I have used a dandruff preventing shampoo, T-Gel by Neutrogena. Even though it wasn’t even dandruff to begin with. And I didn’t even have dandruff nor have I ever had it. For those of you who disagree, my head was more than likely peeling at the time. I have never had dandruff since. But the funny thing is? I am afraid to switch back to some other shampoo. Pert, head and shoulders, even Michelle’s girly stuff I am afraid to go to for more than one day in fear of seeing that one flake again on my shoulder. When I go on vacation and use the hotels shampoo (that doesn’t even foam WTF?) I am scared I will return home with dandruff. Sometimes you just get used to a product and you just continue to go with it. Other times you continue to go with a product out of fear of the unknown.

Flying a redeye for more than 2 hours by yourself has to be one of the loneliest experiences in the human life. Well maybe I’m exaggerating that. But if you’ve got any luck like me you’ll get placed next to the huge black guy that falls asleep immediately then starts snoring and then across the aisle from you will be the nursing mother whose baby obviously hates to fly. Now, I’ve never flown a redeye by myself. But I have flown by myself before. And I did alright. But knowing how I’d feel in that dark cabin, surrounded by strangers, me and my ipod and book…cramped in that confined space with recycled air…The thought alone makes me kind of sick. And for me, I think that is the ultimate loneliness. I felt that; sometimes in the city during one of those summers that I basically lived alone. Being surrounded by so many people, but not knowing one lick about any of them. And most of them feeling the same way you do…maybe you just ignore everyone else and they won’t bother you. I hope they get the fact that I’m buried in my book and rocking out to my music that they won’t ask me anything.

Because maybe the big fear is that people can’t carry on a conversation for more than 10 minutes. Ever had to have a conversation 1 on 1 with someone for more than 10 minutes? Someone you don’t know? It’s hard. And on a plane you really just can’t get up and walk away. That is your seat.

I wish there was a way we could just say to another person, “No offense, but I’d like this conversation to end and I’d like you to think good thoughts of me”. That would be such a life saver in those situations. I’d love to use that line at work too. Maybe we could come up with some sort of hand signal for it? Maybe?

I think that these rando posts are so good for me because first of all, I’m very scatterbrained. And second of all, I day dream a lot. And not necessarily about unrealistic things either. About simple things like that hand signal I previously mentioned that would mean, “Ok, I’m done talking now”.

Ever since moving up to the 2^nd floor in my building there has only been one thing I’ve loved about it. And that sadly enough is: the men’s bathroom. And it’s not even the bathroom itself. It’s the door to the men’s bathroom. Somehow, the men’s bathroom door handle got broken – I’m assuming from a disgruntled 2^nd floor working male. It’s now bent so that no one ever has to touch the handle – the door is always slightly ajar. To go in you push. To leave you pull a bit. And for some reason touching wood with your fist or elbow seems much more sanitary than grabbing a metal handle with your hand. This is my OCD hard at work.

I am sadly attempting a “pho”-hawk. Yes. Pho. Well, maybe not. I am not that Asian. So we’ll leave it at “Faux”. Even though I am not French. ARG! So confusing. Let’s just say a mound of hair that comes to a point in the middle of my head. Very posh and beckish…or maybe just becks. I saw my dad’s picture from the 70s and he looked badass like Bruce Lee in his tight denim button up shirt and corduroy bell bottoms. To finish off the look? Hair almost to his eyes. Now I’m pretty sure I couldn’t pull the look off. But I’m going to at least try. For a few months while I grow my hair out it’ll be in that weird point where it’s not too long and it’s not too short. And I hate to gel my hair so it’ll just look like I just rolled out of bed every day. Not that it already didn’t look like that.

I take off my wedding ring every now and then. When my fingers are skinny enough to take it off. When I’m doing yard work, working out, taking a shower, or even when sleeping. I guess sometimes I feel more comfortable, or “hand agile” when I don’t have it on. But sometimes I forget it. I leave it in the car after going to the gym. I leave it at home when I go to work. And I freak. I freak out for hours. I know exactly where it is, but I know that one of these days when I know exactly where it is, it won’t be there. And on that day is when I’m going to get castrated. I should just not run the risk and wear it all the time. I should. I love operative words.

It being almost August, I should really start on my marathon training. It is one of my new year’s resolutions, so I should really at least complete half of them. I’m worried though because of my shin. Randomly it’ll just start hurting. I promise I will go get it checked out. And I promise to run less hills than I was running in the past. They say you need 16 weeks to train for a marathon. Guess what? This weekend marks the start of week 1 of 16. And I haven’t gone to see the podiatrist yet. I should’ve done that last month. I should’ve.

New friends are good. However, it’s a complete feeling out process for the first few months. You have no idea where you stand with the others, and if you get a little bit too comfortable it might get uncomfortable. Sometimes I wonder about groups of friends. I have a hard time hanging out with one person from a group of friends, however when the group is together I feel just fine. Of course I could look deeper in to this, but I’m not going to.

Cutting your toenails is so weird. Think about the position you sit in when you cut your toenails. Some people do it ass on the ground, toes pointing away from them, chin on knee, arms reaching out, one to stabilize the toe and the other to cut. Sometimes I sit in a chair and cross my legs like a man (this is stupid, but I can cross them like a woman too) – but cross them a little bit further. Other times I do the same thing, but sit Indian style while on the floor. I was thinking about people who are very flexible. Or even contortionists. I bet they have a much easier time cutting their toe nails. In fact, I would wager that their feet are better cared for than an un-flexible person like myself since I’m sure they spend more time with their feet…closer to the proximity of their face at least. Or at a minimum they have the ability to just reach out and touch them at any point. Speaking of cutting your nails, I make it a point to cut my right nails first, since my left hand isn’t as skilled with the nail clippers – or skilled in general as my right hand. Therefore, I’m always leaving the easy stuff for last.

Nike’s Dri-Fit clothing is my favorite stuff right now. I just bought another shirt and I love it. The only down side about them is I “nip-out” in them. Because the fabric is so thin that you can see my giant pointy nipples. I heard that in the UK the longer your nipples are the sexier. Probably not true at all. Probably someone just making fun of me. And then when I got to the UK I’d just want to move back after they laughed at my long nipples. Yes, they are long. Freaking glass cutters. Anyway, Nike: Please make me an entire wardrobe based off of your Dri-Fit material. I am willing to pay a good amount. I understand that you make dressy golf polos, but where are the socks and pants? Some of us work during the day too. We can’t all be playing sports all the time.

I love Jim Cramer. He is on CNBC and is a stock guru. At first I was very skeptical of what he did. But now that I’m almost finished with “Real Money” and I’ve watched more of his show, “Mad Money”, I find him to be completely entertaining while he educates. I didn’t really want to pump him in my rando post, but I didn’t also want to spend 3 pages pumping him either. So here’s what you get President of Cramerica. A paragraph. You’ve helped out a lot of us little guys immensely. I hope to see your show still on in at least 3 years. I was planning on buying a bobble head for my desk because I don’t think many people know who he is at my work. And being “in the know” vs. people who have no idea what you’re talking about is an awesome feeling. Kind of like acorn socks.

Some POW (Pearls of Wisdom – Old school) from my Ninong Ramon from this weekend: “The large print giveth and the small print taketh away”. “Don’t work hard for your money, make your money work hard for you”. Words of advice from one of the richest people in my extended family. Not very helpful – since I knew this stuff already, but still from someone who’s been there done that – I’m not going to stop him if he wants to lend a guiding hand.

I am worried about earthquakes. So much so that I might call our insurance company tomorrow and see how much earthquake insurance is. Recently, there was a large earthquake in Japan, and within 3 days there was one in Oakland. For some reason I felt it was moving up the coast – and in all honesty I think the “big one” if we ever have it, could destroy this region. Seattle is built on top of old Seattle. Everything would crumble. And if I don’t have earthquake insurance, this investment that I’m sitting on right now could be worth nothing. Just thinking about what would happen if a huge earthquake hit us scares the heck out of me. It could possibly cripple all of Seattle. I am thinking Katrina-like disaster here…would we all end up in Vancouver BC or Portland? Would there be a mass exodus from Seattle while it was getting rebuilt? Could people ever come back to this area if they had lost loved ones? There are so many questions I’ve thought about because I honestly think we’ll have the big one soon here. And I’ve been through 2 puny earthquakes in my lifetime, and each time I was just amazed at how unprepared we all were…what makes me think we’ll do any better when something of real magnitude hits us…I’m not really sure how I’m going to end that sentence. Regardless, I hope/pray it doesn’t come within my lifetime. But just seeing that large earthquake in Japan followed by the one in Oakland just made me open my eyes a little bit to the possibility…Sometimes I feel like I can be lulled in to a sense of security when nothing bad happens for awhile…If earthquake insurance is $200 or less than it’ll be worth it for me. I should call…should.